*The first 15 words are from Desiderata by Max Ehrmann.
Having used Twitter for five years, I've seen certain Twitter truths manifest themselves each and every day. These truths aren't related to getting more followers, rather, they're related to what you should expect from others who use it, and your own "twittiquette."
1. Remember the twitter follower/following ratio. I guess it's about 50/50. If you only have 1,000 folllowing you, you won't be able to follow much beyond that figure. So get more followers.
2. Expect NOTHING in return for retweets or compliments to people.
3. Acknowledge those who follow you. Try to do this at least once a week.
4. Don't think celebrities will retweet or favorite your tweets to them, and certainly don't expect a direct reply. That's just the way it goes with celebrities. And does it really matter?
5. Trolling is okay, really. Just know what you're talking about, and be nice.
6. In some circles, Twitter can be cliquey. I've found this to be true among certain circles occupied by political pundits. They tweet and send kudos to each other, but usually not to peons outside their circle of writers, reporters, or news anchors.
7. IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU A QUESTION, ANSWER IT.
8. No vulgarity, even with # inserted for letters. C'mon.
9. If someone follows you whose bio seems to indicate they're someone who violates #8, check out a few of their tweets and followers. If you see they have a tendency toward #8, block 'em. At least, I would.
10. Don't expect jokes to get a response. I'm amazed at how most of my best one-liners just lay there.
Bonus #11: SPELLING!
And also, please learn the differences between: your/you're, they're/there/their, its/it's, and than/then.